Oy Vey, Children and their Antics

This week the kids have been super duper extra creative. The weather has been extremely gorgeous for this time of year and they've been spend a giant portion outside with New Puppy "Bear". (Yeah, I know - but that's a separate post and pictures will be coming - but he's SOOO cute!) Well, while 1 & 2 have been outside they've been up to quite a few umm.. Antics.. If you will.

1. The Glue Slide:  They procured 2 big bottles of white Elmers type glue, opened them, and poured them ALL OVER their outside slide. (In literally the 3 minutes it took me to go to the bathroom.) When I discovered their Glue Slide (that they were sliding down, none-the-less) I MAY have shouted through the door for them to get to cleaning that up before it dried into a giant never to be cleaned up again mess. I started lunch. I look back out the window and BOTH kids (yes, I do have a boy and girl BTW) are completely naked peeing on our tree stump. So, back out I go to find out exactly WHY they are naked (I'm just assuming they are peeing on the stump because they are naked already and had to pee..) and I get this answer. "Well, you told us to clean the slide, so we took this bucket and poured water on the slide and have been sliding down and washing it off with our belly. But our clothes got wet and that was uncomfortable, so we took them off and THEN slided down."

So basically. Just to clarify. They took off all their clothes to wash off the glue on the slide with their naked bellies after pour buckets of cold water down it. I can't "argue" because they were doing exactly what I said to do. And yet. OMG. It then became "Bath Day".

2. The Rock Catapult: 1 & 2 were outside again playing. #2 comes in sobbing. I go and see what happened and who did what to who (because someone always did something, but usually the crier did something too..) And The Boy sobs out, "I got hit by a rock." I repeat that back to him because really? He got magically hit by a rock?? And then the REAL explanation comes. "Well, I was making a rock catapult and I was putting a really big rock in it and I missed and the rock fell and hit my leg." 
Because I'm more amused and curious at this point I just HAVE to ask, "Why exactly are you making a rock catapult?"
The boy looks annoyed at me and says, "Because the dogs really like it when we throw rocks at them so they can eat them."
We now have a No Rock Catapult For The Dogs Rule.

He cheers up quickly after than, then shouts as he's headed back towards the door to his sister, "Hey, Let's start working on our slingshot since Mom said no more catapult!! I bet we can make it work REAL good for some of those big rocks!"


3. Stick Ball:  Once again, 1 & 2 were outside. (I know you'd think at this point they'd be forbidden.) I hear #2 sobbing again. He comes in escorted by his sister. I ask what happened since he's holding the side of his face. #1 starts explaining that *all* they were doing was playing ball. Ok. So why is he crying? And. Wait. You didn't TAKE a ball outside. She then clarifies they MADE a ball and she threw said ball and he MISSED catching it and it hit him in the face. So, I ask, what was this *made up ball* made of? Sticks. They made a ball of STICKS. Now, how much trouble can I get either of them in when 1 in already injured, and the other honestly can't figure out why this is wrong? She said she was sorry and put herself in time out for a few minutes. But she really thought it was a *Good* game.

So now. We also have a No Playing Catch With Sticks Rule which goes with the No Making Balls With Sticks and just in case it was unclear the No Throwing Sticks At People Rule.  I had to go with the trifecta rule because she honestly didn't see why throwing a Stick Ball at her brother's face what a *bad* plan.  And darn it all, I like his eyes intact!


Now, just so you don't think I'm this lazy parent that shoves my kids outside for hours on end and doesn't watch them and they just go and cause trouble. I DO let them go outside and play by themselves now, but they are 7 and almost 6 in a fully (relatively) inescapable yard with a privacy fence that we've mostly *kid proofed*. There are obviously sticks and rocks, but not much else. I check on them at least every 3-5 minutes and you know, if they get into trouble within 3-5 minutes with sticks and rocks, they are hell bent on getting into trouble and gonna do it anyhow. They may as well do it in MY backyard where I can band-aid them back together and tell them not to do it again. Most parents now don't let their kids out of their sight to play outside at all, and while I don't let them go into the front yard or the street or to the neighbors house - they can have free rein of their backyard.