Family

We all have it to some extent and it's all in what we DO with it - especially after we are adults that makes it or breaks it, I suppose. My sister.. Let's call her ummmmm "J2" (vs J1 for the other sister) has recently taken on a project to TEACH other people how to "parent". Which, in theory, is a reasonable cause. There are some people who need that kind of course. There are some people who are forced to take that kind of course. And there are some people who lack any common sense at all. What I find strangely ironic is that my sister falls into AT LEAST 2 of these categories. And now that she's "Teaching" THOSE people (you know the ones she is magically better than) she feels she can criticize everyone.

Now, what I think she fails to realize is that parenting isn't a race, a competition, an honor, a mistake or any other odd descriptor like that despite what some people may say. It is in fact a CHOICE. In fact, it's a combination of LOTS and LOTS of choices. And the super crappy thing is: You don't get magical powers to see what the end result will be when you make the choice. You don't see what will happen. As cool as it would be, it just doesn't happen. I can name the biggest choice I've made for T1 I wish, with HINDSIGHT wish I hadn't, but - at that TIME - it seemed like the best choice for her. *shrug* Not a damned thing I can do with that choice now but try to fix the ongoing damage she still has a year later.

What I also think is odd, is J2 calls my parents and chews them out for THEIR parenting skills. DUDE... You are 32 years old. GROW UP. Get over it. They were young, stupid and did the best they could with what they had. So they made some mistakes. Get over it. YOU are making some mistakes. Do you want your kid to call YOU in 30 years and run YOU up the flag pole because you are doing the best YOU can with that you have? No, probably not.  *sigh* We all make mistakes. It's what people DO. It's the nature of the beast.

But no one wants to hear, repeatedly, how they screwed something up 30 years ago.  Good lord, I don't really want to hear - repeatedly - how I screwed something up last week. Heavens sakes I know I DID but *I* am already over it..

And maybe that's why J2 and I are not close anymore. Maybe I just don't like being reminded about how when I was 5, I made her cry about spilling a cup or argued about something or took someone else's side in an argument. Because REALLY. Who cares?

And now for your amusement..

BIRTHDAY!!!!

We are going to jump ahead from Seattle for a moment and attack T1's 6th birthday. Because, well, it is more important and makes people happy vs not happy... (Mostly me..) This is the FIRST year the girl has EVER had a decent birthday. There were no meltdowns, fits, screaming, hiding, throwing of things, sobbing over meaningless things, panic attacks that lasted forever.. UNTIL: After her birthday. We are still trying to figure out what the deal is with that.  I think a BIG problem is a little girl that T1 has become OBSESSED with (we shall call her "L") didn't show up. T1 has seen this girl literally 4 times in a year, but decided she was her BEST FRIEND EVER and would be loving her forever. But since school started, I've not been able to contact her mom, invited her over to play to no avail, invited her to the party etc with no response.


Some friend that is..

BUT... T1 is still rather devastated. We've had to do A LOT of talking about how we cannot control the choices of other people, that people are not puppets, and that we HAVE a ton of great people who love us dearly who would do darn near ANYTHING for us and screw the b*&^# who doesn't bother to like us.  Heartbreakingly enough, she had me help her write a "Break Up" letter to "L". We are still holding it, to see if we REALLY want to mail it (admittedly for a 6 year old it is really harsh but honest) or if we will be ok with just letting it go now.

Now, on to funner things.. CAKE!!

We had 2. 1 that I let T1 decorate all on her own:

And 1 that, due to my inabilty to use my left hand (yes, there is a story, and yes I'm sure you will laugh..) I baked and Sarah ( http://oursunnyview.blogspot.com/ ) did the majority of the actual decorating. Because I suck. Well.. I don't ACTUALLY suck at cake decorating.. I just do when I can't use 1 of my hands..

It was gorgeous. And demolished in tasty goodness. And no.. While it does appear odd, there is NO actual Bisquick in the cake.

She had a heap of fantastic friends come over and shower her with love and you know what.. Screw "L".. I don't care what happened, maybe you "didn't get the invitation", "didn't remember", or "had something else to do that night". I don't care. You broke my 6 year old's heart. Obsessed as she may be ( because I do admit it's odd), you could at least let her down easily and finally.